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Weird News, Idiotic Statements, And Stupid Criminals  

Weird News, Idiotic Statements, And Stupid Criminals
Nancy Morgan
February 16, 2009

In a week chock full of idiotic statements, we still have a clear winner of the RightBias award for:
Here’s an absolutely remarkable video in which Senate majority leader Harry Reid repeatedly explains to a dumbfounded interviewer that paying income taxes is completely voluntary. In fairness, Reid has half a point, as it appears paying taxes is indeed voluntary for most of our elected officials.
Our new President, Messiah Obama, is a close runner up with his statement that the newly passed $787 billion spending bill "doesn't contain any earmarks." Hold on, I think I just saw a pig fly right by my window!
Jailbird, drug addict, and former DC Mayor and current Council member Marion Barry said that the stress of undergoing dialysis has "distracted him from filing a recent tax return." Oops.

One night stand goes awry
A drunken fling ended in disaster for Wayne Robinson, 24, who woke up to find his lover's name carved into his arm. There's a moral in there somewhere.

A prominent Buffalo area businessman who founded the Bridges TV network to improve the image of Muslims in the U.S., has been arrested and charged with murdering his estranged wife – by beheading hear.
A Michigan zoo celebrated Valentine's Day by charging $50.00 to watch animals having sex.

Longest fingernails in the world

The Guinness World Record for longest fingernails was broken when Salt Lake City resident Lee Redmond, who had been growing her nails since 1979, was involved in a four-car pileup and, gasp, broke her fingernails.
Two women are fighting for their lives after cosmetic injections aimed at giving them 'J.Lo' style bottoms went disastrously wrong. Andrea Lee, 30, suffered total kidney failure after being 'poisoned' with what is believed to be industrial silicone.
Police in northern Sweden broke open the door of a hostel on Friday night after they mistook the sound of an opera singer practising her scales for the heartrending screams of a woman under attack.

Two women saw a little more than they expected as they jogged on the Katy Trail in Dallas this week. The joggers ran by a naked man painted orange around 11 a.m. Thursday. “He was a terra-cotta color,” said personal trainer Nancy Cole.

Transsexual mob boss, Ugo Gabriele
A transsexual Mafia boss has been arrested by Italian police in what is believed to be the first case of its kind. Ugo Gabriele, 27, who insisted on being called Kitty, was held by armed officers in a raid. Which leads us to our growing file on:
A regular customer at a San Francisco bank was arrested after he allegedly robbed the branch and left his ATM card behind.
A man was charged with misusing 911 for calling in an emergency complaint that a Boynton Beach Burger King had run out of lemonade. Guess he should have stuck with kool-aid.
A naked man on a motorcycle crashed into an Arkansas state trooper's cruiser. He now faces misdemeanor charges. Hmmm... 

A former Cameron County assistant district attorney was arrested and charged after cops found him defecating outside a local International House of Pancakes. It could be argued that he was just doing what comes naturally.

A 31-year-old gang member fatally wounded himself last week as he was cleaning a firearm while intoxicated, Fresno police said. It is the second time in just over two weeks that a gang member suffered self-inflicted gunshot wounds.

Las Vegas Police say the parents of a 3-year-old boy who was attacked by a pet python snake have been arrested on felony child neglect, abuse and endangerment charges. 

Check out Chloe, the cat who loves water. Chloe's owner said he can barely keep Chloe out of the shower these days. 'She loves the feel of warm water and I can see her ears prick up every time I put the shower on.'

There has been a need for new technology to clean monitors from all the spit and coffee spewed upon them. Well here it is, just one click and your dirty monitor will be cleaned. Gotcha.

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Feel free to forward your own nominees for the above categories. In the meantime, keep smiling.

Nancy Morgan

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